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Str8-Acting vs. The Gay Stereotype
So, I'm part of a few online websites to meet guys. Often, when I read people's profiles, they say things like "I'm str8 acting and want you to be too" and lines similar to that. I've always been bothered reading this because I feel that many members of the gay community do not support or feel that "stereotypical" gays make the community look bad. If a gay guy loves to do hair and is good at it, why should be compromise what he loves to do in order to seem less stereotypical? I genuinely feel bad for guys on websites who naturally fall into these stereotypes and are looking to find someone to date.
So my questions for this discussion: Do you think people who fall into gay stereotypes give gays a bad name? How do you define "feminine?" And finally, what's wrong with guys (gay, straight, bi, etc.) who act "feminine?"
So my questions for this discussion: Do you think people who fall into gay stereotypes give gays a bad name? How do you define "feminine?" And finally, what's wrong with guys (gay, straight, bi, etc.) who act "feminine?"
Tags: acting, dating, feminine, gay, sports, stereotypes, str8, straight
Views: 0
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Westhamdaz on -
You're welcome
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Permalink Reply by Grant A. Gordon on -
Personally, I think it is extremely obnoxious. I wouldn't be caught with a flamer ever! They really piss me off. I consider myself very masculine, so obviously I don't want to date a guy that acts like a stupid, bitchy, immature queen. Why would I wanna do that?! I'm surprised I've never just flat-out smacked some in the face. Believe me, I have been tempted. Haha.
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Permalink Reply by Daniel Warburton on -
Im "straight acting" many people dont realise im gay (a main reason for joining!) and find it very hard to find someone as a result.(i have my moments i admit! much to the amusement of my friends... it seems!)
Well i was talking about this with friends not long ago, both straight and gay (and some of the actually straight guys are camper than most gay guys i know... but not my point) most of us couldnt decide how/when/why the stereotypical 'camp' gay starts sounding like kenneth williams!
(who can pull it off!)
and are they putting it on?
My friends were saying and i agree that (cue society changing rant!) many men straight and gay are taking more care in their apperance just look out on a saturday night!
My friends have nicknamed me the "homophobic gay" (questioning why their my friends!) as i dislike the 'stereotype' image and i become quite awkward when around or having passes made at! (again they find it soooooo funny! and often try and set me up on blind dates, just to see my reaction.) But thats me. i cant help that.
but i agree with 'Westhamdaz' in that, it is personality that counts and if i meet a "stereotype" that i get on with and both of us wanted a relationship etc. i wouldnt say no. it maybe harder than with someone who is 'straight acting' but who said love was easy? (as i really would 'like' to 'meet' that person!)
but the best point, to me [which i agree with to a degree] (made by a straight friend! but i question that!) was wouldn't it defeat the object (i think they think its a game/task of somekind) of being gay and liking -MEN- if the -MAN-[they kept stressing that] was "effeminate"? (actual words were 'well... err... girly... ...ish')
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Permalink Reply by Westhamdaz on
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Cheers Daniel, glad that there is someone that agrees with me to some extent. Hope you get on OK with the job x
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Permalink Reply by Charlie on -
This reply is stupid. When I have opportunity, I'll take the time to challenge the thoughts expressed in this forum post. I just wish someone who post a dumb reply that hasn't been expressed a million times. And just because you like guys, that doesn't mean a guy can't be sensative, nice, nuturing, and emotional (in an expressive sense), which are traditionally "feminine" mannerisms and characteristics.
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Permalink Reply by Anthony on -
Be yourself, and be proud of it. Life is too short to worry about other people's issues!!
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Permalink Reply by Garrett Griggs on -
i love how people must think that gays must fall under a certain group as opposed to being just...people. we're not some tribe separated from others. we're not of our own nationality. giving us bad names? whatever. I just think people should be judged on themselves, not as a representation. let people be. and there are a few straight people that act flamboyant too. i think people should be viewed as themselves and as PEOPLE. not as gay, or straight, or black, or fat, or WHATEVER. sorry if I come off as arrogant. just that this is my opinion :p
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Permalink Reply by Westhamdaz on
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Well then there's a few peole that I can be friends with on here anyway, lol. xx
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Permalink Reply by DahKo on -
As an Effeminate Gay Male myself, i run into this crap all the time, people are like, nahh i like more Str8 acting guys.
ok i dont think i fall into the catagory of Queeny nor Loud Flamey gay guys, i fall more into the catagory of being more intouch with my Feminine side, Girly for lack of a better word, most people dont realize this until i tell them or someone else brings it up, i mean i am open about myself, but im not gonna scream it at every person who walks by hahaha
personally, the "Str8 Acting" types are something i look for, but i dont let that blind me to others outside of that, though i wont date anyone more Effeminate then Myself, but i like to keep my options open
as for how i Define feminine, its hard to put, i have many many female and effeminate gay friends, and though i'd class most as Feminine, they are each different in the way they Portray themselves and the energy about them, i doubt i could Define Feminine in my own words without using someone elses lol
i dont think the stereotypes make the whole look bad, everyone is in there own ways Unique, i think the Stereotypes are fun and add a little Life to this Community, as far as im concerned if we were all "Str8 Acting" well this community would be Bland and Dull hahaha lol
but hey thats my own view hehe
- Daevon )O(
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Permalink Reply by steve martin on -
I honestly dont think any gay person should be considered one type of gay or another .were all in the same catagory.(GAY). But at the same time gay people are raised differently and in different enviroments,creating what the gay and straight community call fem, butch bi....I also think what ever one of these people are trying to classify you as is an attempt to understand you or putting you in a catagory thats sexually pleasing to that individual.I always say that my sexual preferance is what I like I cant change the fact that I do like a more masculine man but that doesnt mean that dating a feminine man is out of the question.Its just a matter of personal taste...Straight people will never change .Thier attitudes towards gay men or woman were instilled in them at a very young age by the way they were brought up.Straight people either like or hate us its just like black or white . Thanks for listening.....................Steve Martin.....
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Permalink Reply by olly_nova on -
masc, fem, top, bottom, love, hate, men, women, Hilary, Obama.
People are different, People like different things and characteristics, This should be okay. I don't mind masc or fem. Some friends of mine only do fem guys, it depends.
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